My Choice

When I tell people that I am homeschooled (or independent studies if I’m feeling fancy), I dread the inevitable questions: “What is that like?” “Why are you doing this?” “Wow! I could never do that! How do you stay on task?”

Inwardly, I sigh and prepare for my response. I don’t mind talking about myself, but the response to these questions is so endless that I know I am on the diving board of a conversation that will require a whole lot of work before I finally surface gasping and relieved to continue on to any other conversation topic.

So, let’s start with why I chose this uncommon path.

Ever since kindergarten, I have loved school and learning. Learning meant discovery and light. Math meant a puzzle to be solved. Reading was a pleasurable pastime where you get to wander into a world and escape. I was a lucky child to love school and to have the good memory to not need to try too hard. But, school is not about curiosity and discovery. Well, it is, but that is not all of it. The institution of schooling undertakes the task of grouping together kids by somewhat close age. Disregard the natural interests, the personal abilities and disabilities, the rates at which they mature. Let’s clump together similarly aged children and judge their intellects against each others’ by means of standardized tests!

At college prep schools, college admission is everything. Having watched two brothers go through college applications, I always thought this was ridiculous. Sometimes I think, “Is everyone convinced that once you are in a good college you reach the end of your timeline and you just dissipate into rich, successful bliss? That we just need to trick colleges into accepting us? What about during and after college? College is not the end all, be all.” In order to get students into college, high schools set out a specific path for the students. But, I want to live at my own pace. If I desire to go faster in math, that should be an option. If I need more time to understand those dang three-dimensional vectors, that should be an option. If I design a physics and dance project to sate my curiosity, I should have the encouragement and resources to follow it through.

Anyway… my choice stemmed from the realization that there was not enough time in the day to accomplish all of my interests. How could I stay competitively skilled in dance, while exploring acting, while developing my singing, while pursuing the highest academics available? Not to mention, how could I enjoy each day and not be counting time until the end of class, end of the week, or end of the year. I needed an individualized curriculum and a flexible schedule. This issue prompted me (and my parents—parents exist in this process, too) to look at the various forms of alternative schooling. I started considering this in the spring of 9th grade, took a year to let it sit, and during that year, developed an absolute need to switch into independent studies. Then started the logistics and planning and paperwork….